Getting a bad evaluation from Internship #3 would have hurt a lot more if Internship #1 didn't write that I "exceed standards" on every category. Vin wrote that I was a diligent worker, very bright, and dependable. It's nice to know other people think you're dependable. Just to think about how often I depend on people who can't pull through and then to be told my bosses feel they can rely on me is great!
The best part about wrapping up your internship is getting your evaluation. I take these really seriously because interning is a learning process, and to be able to get honest feedback on what you've done for the past few months is invaluable. I also love to know what I do best and it's never a bad idea to know what you could improve upon. I truly do not mind constructive criticism and never take it personally.
So I stole this from The Life of Sass. I figured it'd be fun to do since I've never done something like this before and it involved music so you know I'm down for it. The rules are to put your iPod on shuffle and then put whatever song comes up as the answer for each question and you can't skip around til you find one that makes sense.
Here we go!
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
That's All I Ask Of You - Tony! Toni! Tone! (not exactly...)
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Bad Girl - Jon B. (Sorry, Mom!)
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
I'm So Into You - Aaliyah (When I decide I like a guy, I really like 'em)
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Everyday Struggles - Notorious B.I.G.
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Get You Right - Pretty Rick (I aim to please)
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
What More Can I Say - Jay-Z (The first lines of this song are, "Are you not entertained?" and ends with "We'll see what happens when I no longer exist")
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Invisible Man - 98 Degrees (not true)
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Time Machine - T-Pain (I am a big fan of reminiscing, I must say)
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Feelin' It - Sammie (what?)
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
On Bended Knee - Boyz II Men (I HATE begging)
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
I'm Grindin - (this song is by an artist I c0-manage...and it's probably true)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Only Human - Bobby Valentino (Can't I be super woman or something instead?)
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Unbelievable - Notorious B.I.G. feat. R. Kelly
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Baby Don't Go - Fabolous feat. T-Pain
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Comfortable - Lil Wayne feat. Babyface (I suppose I'm fairly comfortable)
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
True Love - Faith Evans
WHAT IS 2+2?
Listen - Talib Kweli (I've always had a hard time with math)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Director - Avant (she does know what she wants ha)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Sweet - Jay-Z (very true, sweetest guy you'll ever meet)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
I Got A Story to Tell - Notorious B.I.G. (hilariously untrue)
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I Tried - Bone Thugs n Harmony feat. Akon (it better be more like "i came i saw i conquered" not i tried!)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Can't You See - Styles P feat. Lemar
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
I Said I Really Love You - Boyz II Men (also very true, I have a slight fear of commitment)
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Jezzebel - Boyz II Men (oh boy...)
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Thugz Mansion (Acoustic) - Tupac feat. Nas (one of my favorite songs, a classic)
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Down For Me - Loon
There's a certain feeling you get when you find what you're meant to do in life. I can't explain it, I can only say that it came to me the first time I heard Boyz II Men sing "Thank You" and it's been with me ever since. I went through a lot of bumps chasing what I'm supposed to do with my life, but I never forgot that feeling and it always, only made me stronger. Until recently.
Everyone at work is talking about the various holiday parties going on in the industry this season. I have no desire to go to the party, if there even is one, for internship #1, if I were even invited in the first place! All this talk reminds me of the work holiday party I went to last year. The one that was in the show room of my office...the one where we had a painfully long karaoke session that quickly turned into a striptease, left that office, went out to dinner, then went to a bar, and by the time I left...our tech guy was sleeping at the bar, and our other tech guy was making out with the tech girl, getting ready to leave with her. The next day my boss told me if I went into the office to get her computer I could stay home the rest of the day. I got to the office and less than half the company was there and the people that were there were either a) hung over or b) feeling awkward about the previous night's shenanigans. The night was however, one I think of often and with fond memories.
I didn't take part in anything too crazy, but in case you did, here are a few tips to avoid that awkward next day conversation in the office kitchen.
The Daylight Rule - It's okay to drink at your office's holiday party, but don't drink more than you would during the day. A lot of times we feel protected by the darkness of the night and tend to act out of character. Socialize and have a drink or two, but you shouldn't be drunk. Always remember to keep your drink in your left hand so you right hand is free to shake hands with other people.
Spread Out - Holiday parties are one of the few times you'll be in the same room with the people on the very bottom of the food chain and the very stop. It's easy to stick with your go-to group of office friends but try to spread out and socialize with different people. I took the opportunity to talk to the CEO last year and we had such a nice conversation, we even took pictures. After that he always said hello to me and remembered my name.
Research - Make sure you know what type of party this is--is it going to be in the office, at a bar, at a bowling alley? The setting can give you a pretty good idea of what the atmosphere will be. Find out what the dress code is too..unless you go to work everyday wearing casual clothes (like I usually do) you don't want to wear something too crazy or too revealing. I think of these parties in the same way as when you were a kid and saw your teacher in regular people clothes outside of the classroom on weekends. People will be looking at you differently in this different setting and you still want to keep it on some type of professional level.
Show Up - People will be talking about those who don't show up and often times, the holiday party is a great way to bond with your co-workers. You don't want to miss out on this and be excluded from the party convos around the office the next day. Even if you only stay an hour, make the effort to show up and appear happy to be there! Don't stay out too late though because you DO have to go to work tomorrow and you can't exactly lie to your boss and say you can't come to work because your dog is sick when the entire office knows you were out partying until 3 am.
Most importantly, have a good time...you worked hard all year and you deserve it! Remember to think about what kind of office culture your company has and translate that to a party setting. Happy Holidays :-)
I've heard it over and over again for the past three years, "You have to have tough skin," "You have to have a thick exterior to make it out here." I always think of snake skin when I hear this phrase, I'm not even really sure why because upon further thought, snake skin sheds and is actually pretty thin. I do not have tough skin, at least, I don't think I do.
It's only fair to know this before you get in the game...it'd be like signing a contract with the NFL without knowing that you'd have to get tackled and be tackled in order to play. The problem is, how tough do you have to be? Where do you draw the line? And most importantly, who determines the acceptable thickness of my skin? Is there a set measurement that I should try to attain? How tough is tough enough?
I worked really hard on a small project today and around 4:00 I took a bathroom break only to find 2 girls standing outside one of the stalls talking to someone from the other side. "Great." I thought "Is someone throwing up in there? Because I really don't have the stomach for that..." Then it got silent and I heard small whimpers from inside the stall, and the other girls consoling her with the "Its okay" and the obligatory "I'm here for you." They left shortly after I came in the bathroom but the girl was still crying and I could hear her furiously typing away on her Blackberry. What could possibly be happening that you start crying at work? And if its that much of a crisis...why are you still here?!
I scurried out of there for fear of having to be in some awkward situation consoling someone who clearly wanted to be left alone. A little while later I noticed the girl crying in the bathroom was an assistant that sits pretty close to me. I heard her talking about how stressed she is and she wants to quit her job and you know, the usual ranting and raving one could expect from a disgruntled employee.
I couldn't help but think, does that mean she's not tough enough for this? This particular girl cries at work fairly often. Does it mean her boss thinks her skin isn't thick enough and that she just isn't cut out for this? I've never cried at work, but I'm not really a crier. There have been times where I may have wanted to, but I calm myself down before it escalates, because I don't want to be labeled the "cry baby" or seen as not tough enough. I tend to crumble when I don't do something perfectly, but in the grand scheme of things, I think thats minimal. I thrive under pressure because to me it means my boss trusts me with a lot and believes that I can get the job done. So maybe I am tough enough. Are you?
Never underestimate the resources on the internet. When I was looking for a job, I would spend hours pouring over Google results for things like "entertainment internships," "internships in New York," "record label intern," and "music industry internships." Sometimes I found websites that were of no use to me, sometimes I found sites that did actually have job postings, and still other times, I found websites that at least offered guidance to keep me focused.
Even after you get hired for an internship, you should continue searching the internet because you never know what's out there waiting for you. Recently, I've stumbled upon Intern Queen, aka Lauren Berger. The site is run by someone who's interned more times than I have! On her website you can find intern tips and even purchase intern clothing from the Internal Ethiks (shirts with sayings like "I Spill Coffee For A Living" and "All Work, No Pay").
The best resource the Intern Queen has to offer is her blog which has internship listings and question/answer posts. So check her out, leave her love, ask her questions, and tell her Intern Chick sent you!
A post from Lauren's Intern Advice section, something I tell people all the time:
Be the intern people remember - remember your co-workers names, build personal relationships with the people around you, try your best and make sure people know who you are. People are lucky to know you. You are not JUST an intern
Kevin Liles is someone I hold near and dear to my heart. When I was trying to get my first internship, the only thing that stood in my way of getting hired at my 1st place was reading his book "Make It Happen" and writing an essay on it. I was up against another intern for the spot, and he had already read the book, so I knew I was behind before the race even started. I rushed to the bookstore, read the book, and wrote my essay, in less than 24 hours. I was hired for the job after that and almost a year later, my boss who had hired me was still talking about my essay. Even though I rushed to read that book, it has stayed with me and something I think everyone, not just interns and not just Hip-Hop heads, should read.
Not only do I hold Kevin Liles in high esteem because of that book but also because he started out as an intern, just like me. He worked really hard to climb his way from the very bottom and today he is the executive vice president of Warner Music Group (one of the few labels who have been able to stay on top). In 2002, as the executive vice president of Island Def Jam Music Group, he cultivated the careers of artists like Jay-Z, Ludacris, Ja Rule, and Kanye West.
I have so much respect for Kevin not only for what he's done in business, but what he's done for Hip-Hop. In the past few years, he's joined Russell Simmons in hosting Hip-Hop summits to teach young kids about the Hip-Hop movement and what that means for our political, social, and cultural future. He's also made it his job to speak about Hip-Hop as a positive force for today's youth and help correct some ugly stereotypes the culture has been plagued by.
The most important thing I've learned from Kevin Liles??
Embrace the Struggle
I think you can figure that one out for yourself ;-)
Check out Kevin Liles on Oprah's Hip Hop Town Hall Meeting....skip to 2 minutes in to hear his wisdom.
I think I have more to offer all of you than just my crazy, hard to believe, intern stories. Being an intern has become a lifestyle for me and not something that has been easy, either! With that said, I'm going to be providing more for my faithful readers.
Some ideas I'm throwing around right now are more Secret Admirer entries (for all my music fanatics), interviews with other intern and industry experts, tips for getting an internship, keeping an internship, living on an intern budget, and eventually leaving that internship (all with style), and something I'm really excited about...featured intern guests who will write about their own experiences as an intern to give those of you who are thinking about interning but not necessarily in the music industry more of an idea of what to expect.
I love reading your e-mails, and comments, so please keep writing and let me know what you want to see or read more of, and even what you want to see less of! If you want to contribute to my blog as an intern guest, please e-mail me at theinternchick@gmail.com and I'd be happy to have you!
Make sure to follow me on Twitter (http://twitter.com/Internchick)
..and come be my friend on Myspace, it gets lonely over there! (http://www.myspace.com/internchick)
I may even post a picture or two of me for all you inquiring minds ;-)
Yesterday I wore heels to work, and I got sent out on a lot of walking errands. So today I wore big comfy cuddly snow boots, because when the Big Boss comes in, it's a guarantee I'll be going somewhere, at least once.
A few hours after I'd been at work, Vin asked me to go meet Big Boss at the cell phone store. I looked up where the store was and asked what I was going there to do (its always good to be prepared) and Vin casually said, "She just needs you to sit in her car while she goes in the store." I thought "oh" casually, this sounds easy enough and I was on my way. Vin gave me his metro card so I could get there fast and told me to call her on her cell phone when I got there and to look for her car, its a BMW. As I was sitting on the train I started to think about how this little task would play out. I pictured her running into the store, and me sitting there waiting. Easy enough.
Then my mind started to race. What if someone came and told me I had to move the car? Would I have to drive it? Where would I even drive it to? Why can't I just go in the store for her and SHE sits in the car? I can't do this, why can't Vin do it?! He drives her car all the time.
I finally got there, and by there, I mean 6th Avenue and 42nd street, you know, really close to Rockefeller Center where they'd be lighting the Christmas tree in a few hours. The traffic was INSANE. This was not what I pictured at all. I slowly pulled out my cell phone and told Big Boss I was at the store, she said she was looking for a spot or somewhere to pull over and told me what street she was on. I walked down a block or two and found her sitting at a red light. We hung up the phone and she pulled down her window and asked what I thought she should do. I stuttered and stumbled over my words...like I know ANYTHING about driving around midtown Manhattan in a mob of Christmas tourists.
Before I knew it, she'd grabbed her bag and hopped out the car, leaving the door open and the car running and said, "Here, you drive it..just circle around the block" and was walking up the street before I could protest. WHAT?????? This is exactly what I didn't want to happen! I just stood there, dumbfounded, trying to process this in my mind. Did she really just leave her car running at a red light on 6th avenue and tell me to drive it?
Did I mention this was a BMW?
I guess she looked back and still saw me standing there, so she called out behind her, "You do know how to drive, don't you??" I yelled, "Y-y-yea..I know how to d-drive" I looked inside the car for a moment, trying to calm myself down, and all of a sudden remembered, "WAIT!!! Is this a standard?!!?" She turned around and said that yes, it was. I thought GREAT! I don't know how to drive a standard, glad thats over. Then she said, "I mean, no it isn't. I mean..you don't need a stick to drive it" Great, I was stuck now, I had no excuse. So I got in. First, I had to figure out how to put the seat back, because Big Boss is actually Tiny Boss, she barely even comes up to my shoulder. There were a ton of buttons, no bar that you pull that moves the seat back like in a regular car for us middle class people. This was not my Mercury that I'm used to. So I started pushing the buttons, the seat went up & down and up & down...that wasn't right. I pushed a few more, the seat back went forward & backward, forward & backward, the side mirrors went up and down, left and right. The seat wouldn't budge. I pressed another and got it to move just a little, but that sent the mirrors into a frenzy and I couldn't see out of them. I put the car into drive and slowly took my foot off the break, I went to press the gas pedal and I couldn't find it, I swore it wasn't there! I felt like I was in some type of horrible nightmare. My boots were too big for the tiny gas pedal, I stepped on the break with my left foot and slowly felt around for the gas. Finally I turned onto 41st Street and went ever so slowly. Big Boss had turned the hazard lights on when she pulled over and I couldn't find that little red triangle button to save my life. I looked everywhere. Meanwhile, a line of cars behind me was beeping and cussing at me. I reached a red light finally, found the button and turned those annoying lights off with a hard push. At least that was settled. I was in such a state of shock when I got in the car that when I put my seat belt on, I tangled my iPod wire in it and now had to leave it that way, while Keyshia Cole blared from the headphones. This was awkward.
I circled around once. It took about 10 minutes, still no call from the Big Boss. I kept seeing signs that said to avoid the streets I was driving on because of the tree lighting...great, who else but me would be stuck in this predicament on such a day? So I went to circle around again. By this time I started to feel like I was in a bad video game. Driving the same track over and over. Dodging obstacles in the road (trucks unloading, dumpsters, cars cutting you off every which way), watching out for people jumping in the road, and swerving through crazy driving cars.
I kept thinking about how hard it is to drive in New York City, and that I'd only done it once before for just a few minutes. Why did my first time have to be in my boss' BMW??? More than 20 minutes had gone by, and I kept hoping she would call as I was passing the store, because if she called after I'd passed it, she'd have to wait 10 minutes for me to get around. Finally, Vin called. I answered the phone and he must have heard the fear in my voice because he said, Intern Chick??? Is that you?? Are you okay??? You sound terrified! All I could muster was "yea, I'm...fine." He said Big Boss was ready for me, just at the time I was approaching the cell phone store. Big Boss got in the driver's seat and I got in the passenger seat. I mumbled an apology about having to move her seat, luckily she was on an important call so I dodged the bullet of having to talk about it.
Phew, I'd made it. It wasn't so bad once I actually did it (and of course, after I figured out how to turn the hazard lights off). Yet another example of how your internship will force you to do things you never thought you could do, and show you that you can, in fact, do it.
My task for tomorrow? Fill Big Boss' new cell phone with ring tones.
As an intern, the question I get asked most is, "So, what are you trying to do?" This usually means, what is my ultimate goal in the music industry, and a lot of times I think people ask this just to find out if you're trying to take their spot. Other times, I think people ask this question so they can tell me to run, and run fast, before the industry turns me into a big hairy scary monster like all the other executives (okay, not all, but most).
It used to be really easy for me. I had everything I wanted to do mapped out, and when I wanted to accomplish it by. It wasn't even like I was setting deadlines because I didn't think I'd need to, I just had this inner feeling that I'd go hard and go far, quickly. But after interning for three years, I'm kind of stuck...almost like I'm stuck on the side of the road with a flat tire. I have all the tools to keep going, but I don't know how to change the old tire and put a new one on.
I used to want to intern so bad, I'd do anything for it. After I interned, my next goal was to graduate college, get a job not being someone's assistant, and by the time I was 30, be the big shot executive. Obviously it was more detailed than that, but those were the main points and stops on my road to pure record industry glory. Oh yea, and then from age 30 onward, I wanted to give urban music a new face, revamp it into what it once was, but better. Unfortunately since then, I've learned a thing or two about this business, and it isn't all that easy.
A lot of times, I feel like I'm too old to be interning again. The other interns at my other jobs are 19 and have never interned anywhere else before, and its exciting for them. It used to be exciting for me too. I kind of feel like all a kid left behind in pre school when all my friends got to move on to kindergarten. At this age, I should be working already, but thats something I can't change so I try not to dwell on it, though it pops into my mind often enough. But then I think about next year, when I do graduate, what am I going to do then? Not everyone ends up taking this particular path, but the one that is most often traveled is intern, then assistant to an executive (for a very long time, and most people, I have yet to see them get past this phase) and then eventually, if ever, the executive. Even that isn't as cut and dry as I make it sound because every year the record industry lays off hundreds of people in an attempt to stay afloat in a drowning sea of file sharing, mp3's, and millions of dollars lost. So not only do you end up starting out working like crazy for free, but then you work as someone's assistant for years, only to get laid off unexpectedly right before Christmas. Some payback that is. And those I do know who have gotten laid off never saw it coming, so how do you even cover your ass in an environment like that?
Is this really what I'm trying to do??
To be continued...
I win the award for most creative blog title, right?!
I hope everyone enjoyed their Thanksgiving. I've been so busy lately, I didn't even have time to think about what I was thankful for. My family isn't the cliche New England type family that goes around the table with eloquent words on what they're thankful for. Its more like the sounds of forks banging on plates and the pouring of wine in our glasses, which is a-ok with me.
Thinking about what I'm thankful for is just something I try to keep in mind at least for a minute or two on Thanksgiving. It helps me keep things in perspective and makes me realize how much I do have. Every year I'm thankful for things like still having my family in my life, having a roof over my head and a bed to sleep in every night, having clean drinking water, being fortunate enough to attend college, my health, and my friends--the kind that fill my life with joy and love. Those things are standard.
Crazy things I'm thankful for? I'm thankful for sleep and something I call Baby Pillow, Hip-Hop, Family Guy, digital cameras, cuddly winter clothes like boots and sweatshirts and jackets with fuzzy hoods, old pictures of my grandmother, my cell phone, coloring books and crayons, Nikes, good stories that make me laugh, and the internet.
New things that I'm thankful for this year. Maybe just one thing. I thought a lot about the opportunity that's been presented to me, to be able to live in New York, and work 3 internships. This isn't something everyone will experience in their lifetime and I can't not be thankful that I somehow have managed to attain such a thing. As much trouble as it may give me sometimes, the fact of the matter is, 4 years ago, I'd be dying for something like this and for that, I am thankful. I'm thankful to be able to walk into a record label every day and feel comfortable there because just the very thought of one used to make my stomach do back flips. I'm thankful for everyone that has supported me through the times when I wanted to quit, because without them, I wouldn't have anything else.
So this past weekend my roommates from college came to visit. It was so nice to be around familiar people who knew who I was and know that I'm a little silly, and maybe sometimes a little anal. Anyone who has been to New York once in their lives has been witness to the crazies we have running around here.
Last week on the subway there was a lady having a very heated argument with herself. The whole train stopped their chatter so they could listen to her, and everyone was staring at each other because it was really awkward, she was getting really feisty! I must say, I even put my iPod on pause to get a clip of the convo. Or, yesterday I was grabbing some dinner and this man came running up to me, frantically speaking Spanish...he came out of nowhere! My favorite crazy person New York story though is the time I saw someone pretending to walk their dog, leash and all, and telling the dog to sit.
I used to wonder a lot about what it is in NY that makes people literally lose their minds. When I first moved here last year, I would get on the train and see someone talking to themselves, and look around at everyone else to see how they were reacting. No one would even bat an eyelash, people talking to themselves is pretty normal here. But I could never figure out why! But now I get it.
Being in this city can get pretty lonely. Its so big, and there are so many things to do, but when you're alone, I imagine you must feel that same feeling you got when you were a kid and lost your parents in the grocery store. I guess thats how people go crazy living here, and why most of the time you see them pretending their accompanied by another person. I was so glad my roommates came to visit this weekend, I think they bought me another month or two of sanity :-)
I realize it may not be completely clear what job is what on this blog. So to be clear:
Internship: My original internship that I got in August at a record label. I work in Publishing at this job, and I work for Vin and the Big Boss. I work here three days a week (Tuesday through Thursday)
Job #2: This is the second internship I got sometime around September. I call this a job because it pays me $50/week and because I work from home in my "spare" time to do it. It also requires the most amount of work. My boss for this job is the same boss I worked for last summer, we'll call her Eva. For this, I do internet marketing.
Internship #3: My most recent internship, one that I looked for for quite some time and got hired for back in October. This is also another record label, but I work in the New Media department. This is my favorite internship and one I haven't written much about because I only work here twice a week (Monday and Friday). I have four bosses at this job, two males and two females.
At Internship #3 I mainly deal with our label's website and the websites for all our artists. This also includes their social networking pages. I've worked in New Media in the past, but I strongly feel New Media is the future of the record industry so I jumped at the opportunity to take this job (and they hired me on the spot). There's tons of stuff to be done at this job which is why I like it so much, and I fit in with the office culture much better here. Some of the things I do are update artist websites with news or tour info, make sure the blogs they wrote on Myspace are also posted on their website, create Facebook fan pages, go through every artist site and make sure all the A/V is working properly, and create clips of songs to post online. The main point of the job is to keep our websites accurate and user friendly. I take great pride in working for this company, because they were one of the first record labels to have an online presence and do an amazing job at keeping each website up to date.
All four of my bosses started out as interns and understand what its like to be struggling at the bottom, working for free. This makes for a great boss. They're also young and haven't turned into those typical industry bosses yet. We all work very hard in this department and don't spend a lot of time on bullsh*t (like washing dishes). Overall, Internship #3 was a great find for me and I wish I started it sooner.
So yes, I washed dishes last week. Big Boss likes to order take out and then eat off her own dish. But that dish has to get clean somehow, doesn't it? I guess Vin usually does it, but he wasn't around when she finished her dinner, lucky guy. It went like this.
Big Boss: Internchick? Can you come in my office please?
Me: Yes, Big Boss, what can I do for you?
Big Boss: Can you, uh, take care of my dish?
Me: I'm sorry, what???
Big Boss: Yes..you need to clean off the dish and then wash it in the kitchen and replace it back in my cabinet. Thank you.
Seriously? I don't even wash my own dishes. I prefer plastic forks to silverware any day just so I don't have to wash it. And this wasn't just any dish, I think it wins the world record for heaviest dish in the universe because by the end of the whole ordeal, my arm was shaking. I got soap suds all over the entire kitchen and got some pretty crude looks from the other employees coming into the kitchen.
In all honesty, I've done much worse at my past internships. I've ironed clothes and gone to hotel rooms of strange men to teach them how to burn CDs, I've even gone pants shopping for one of my bosses. I expect these things from an internship, I just thought my boss was not that type of boss. I don't know what I was thinking to be honest, this is the music industry after all.
Sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do at work. But this? This, personal maid service crap? I've washed my (dish) hands of it.
Today I washed dishes.
What. the. hell.
I'm not ready to talk about it. Leave me love.
I should scrap this blog and rename it "Stupid Things That Happen to Me on a Daily Basis," because then I'd be able to write multiple times a day.
Everyone loves bathroom stories, right? I should have been prepared for this...when I was in 5th grade, I wore overalls to school and while I was in the bathroom, I undid the right strap and it went right into the toilet...it was obviously, soaked. I had to leave it hanging the rest of the day and only buckle the left one. I think I single handedly started the "one overall strap over the shoulder" trend at my elementary school. And one time, while in a local deli with my mom, I got locked in the bathroom. I tried for so long and just couldn't get out, and my mom is not the type of worrying mom that comes running when you've been gone for 5 seconds longer than she thought you'd be, so I had to call her cell phone and ask her to help me out, which she then proceeded to get the deli staff to help me. Needless to say, I caused a semi-commotion in the back of the store. The more mortifying part was having to then sit in that deli and eat my lunch while being stared at.
So, yesterday, while I was at internship #3, I was in the bathroom and, as I was drying my hands, I noticed the faucet I had just used was still leaking. Being the earth conscious intern that I am (kind of), I used the paper towel that was in my hands to tighten the faucet, lifted my hand and threw out the paper towel. I took one last look in the mirror and realized I had just taken the knob off the sink and threw it away. SH*T. That's kind of a bad look, and I know there has to be cameras in here somewhere. So what did I do? What would YOU do? I went digging for the knob. I must say, as a first time garbage picker, it wasn't so bad, it was really just paper towels. The sheer weight of the knob forced it down pretty far into the trash and all the paper towels that were in there made a nice nest for it to lay in. I replaced the knob and washed my hands about three times. Someone should really look into fixing that knob, I can't have been the ONLY person to do that, no?
I don't think I wrote about this, but on my first day of work at internship #3 I went into one of the stalls at the bathroom, and there are about 6 stalls there to chose from, and the one I picked was broken and I got stuck in there. It was a good 3 minutes before I finally forced the door open. I was not going to crawl underneath the stall door, I'd rather hang out in the bathroom all day than do that. I was pretty flustered by the time I got outta there.
And today, while out making a Starbucks run for one of my bosses, I went to their bathroom because I really needed to wash my hands. I don't know what I touched, I don't want to know, but there was something really gross on my hands when I arrived at Starbucks so I went to wash up first. I guess I pushed too hard on the soap dispenser because the entire front cover came off and went smashing to the floor. When does this happen, and to who, because I'd like to meet them and cry on each others shoulders. Frankly, I always thought those came undone with a key or something...not a slight push! I couldn't get the cover back on, I couldn't even get it hanging loosely over the dispenser. At least I was alone in the bathroom, so no one saw, but when I got out there was a huge line waiting and I'm sure they heard the crash and obviously, came to see the evidence afterwards.
If I could, I'd stay out of bathrooms all together but it's kind of a necessity. And of course, these things never happen at home.
The Big Boss made an appearance at internship #1 on Thursday. It's always an adventure when she comes in. I did get sent out, in the rain, in my new favorite shoes, on an errand to the weirdest gift wrap store I've never heard of so that she could wrap the CEO's (belated) birthday gift. That was interesting.
While she was there I heard her giving, what I now consider to be the best advice I've ever heard. This advice was directed towards Vin but I listened and I listened attentively, and what she told him was this. She said that when he was an intern and he took direction from her then assistants, Vin was always messing up. In fact, I think her exact words were, "I wanted to fire you everyday" (that made me wonder how she REALLY feels about me). And then she said that now that he works directly for her, he rarely messes up. I missed some parts of the conversation because, after all, I was eavesdropping.
She then went on to say something to this effect. Sometimes you get so concerned with trying to impress your boss, you stop listening. You interrupt, trying to finish their sentence so you can prove yourself and let them know you are 100% in tune with their needs. But what really ends up happening is that you missed the point, and you increase your margin of error. She said that the key was to stop the chatter, and not just the chatter coming out of your mouth, but the chatter in your mind. Just listen, and listen wholly and completely, and you'll get it right.
This piece of advice spoke loudly to me because I am the queen of trying to go above and beyond to please my bosses, and not often, but sometimes I don't get it right because I was 5 steps ahead of where my boss was in trying to explain.
Not to mention, this advice was given after I did an amazing job running the errand for her. She asked me to find a box that was already wrapped, that you could just open and the gift would be inside, rather than having to unwrap something. I went into her office when she was explaining this and sat completely quiet and listened (not because I have some psychic ability and knew she'd be passing this advice to Vin later, but out of pure exhaustion). She told me to go look up any stores nearby that carried what she was looking for. I found one, called them up, had the customer service woman look through their catalog and give me all the information. So not 10 minutes later, I marched into the Big Boss' office, notepad in hand, armed with the answers to her every question.
Big Boss: How big are the boxes they carry?
Me: Anywhere from 2 x 3 to 16 x 13, and I looked up the measurements of the gift which are about 5 x 7 and they have a box that is 7 x 5.
Big Boss: Well, what do they look like?
Me: They're all different patterns, they have boxes that are appropriate for men and women so we shouldn't have a problem finding one.
Big Boss: What are the boxes wrapped in?
Me: I'm not POSITIVE, but I think they're done in their own paper
(By this time, I could tell she was semi-impressed but also trying to catch me with a question I didn't have the answer to)
Big Boss: (long pause) Oh, well that sounds perfect. Let me get my card for you. WAIT! Where are they located?
(I could totally tell she'd thought she caught me with a question I didn't know the answer to)
Me: Not far at all (I proceed to give her the address with the cross streets) so its not far at all, it shouldn't take too long to walk to and come back.
Big Boss: GREAT! Because I really wanted to give it to him before he leaves today. So, here's the card, you know how to sign my name right??
Me: No problem...I'll be back in time. And yes, I know how to sign your name the right way. So I'll be back in a bit, is there anything else you need before I leave?
Big Boss: Oh yea....you don't know how much they are, do you? (She really thought she caught me this time)
Me: The smallest one is $6 but the one that I think will fit the gift best is $13. (I gave her a slight smile that must have said, nice try, but I'm on top of it) And, did you want tissue paper and a ribbon to go with it?
Big Boss: (with a surprised look on her face because she hadn't thought of it) Umm, yea, that'd be great! Thanks, Internchick.
I picked right and she loved what I came back with. I knew she was impressed because there was not one question she asked me that I didn't have the answer to, because I listened to what it was she wanted, and got all the information for her. I decided a long time ago I would never be able to spend enough time with her to impress her and I gave up on it, but because I was just trying to get the job done as she asked, I did it right.
Just like she told Vin, you have to stop the chatter, and the chatter in your mind, and just listen.
One time for your mind..
At work, I feel like the outcast at recess who has no one to play with. In real life, I feel like a million bucks. Is there a sign on the door of my office building that read, "check your confidence at the door" ? If there is, I'm probably holding my head too high to see it, but one thing's for sure, my confidence never even makes it to the elevator.
The office culture at my job is like a secret society. Only the cool kids are allowed and somehow I snuck past the border and they let me in. I can tell the difference when I go to my newest internship and this one. At my new one, everyone smiles and says hello, if you're in the elevator with someone and they see you're getting off on the same floor with you, they immediately strike up a conversation with you because they know you are on their side. At this other internship though, its more like a contest, or something. Whenever I see someone walking around my office, I just get stared at blankly. Sometimes I get looked at up and down and I know all the females there are probably making fun of my clothes in their mind, I can just see it on their face. It didn't even bother me at first, it's just recently starting to get to me.
It is the meanest office culture I've ever experienced. But what are you gonna do about it? I talk to a few people here and there and have found that the ones that are most snotty are the ones that are in fear of their job (aka executive assistants and people who have made up jobs, (like "Brand Manager" seriously?)). The ones who are secure are fairly nice and at least you get a half smile from them.
I've never had such a hard time fitting in at the office before. My first internship it took just one day. The most recent internship I had before all of these, about a week and a half to two weeks before I started getting invited places. I recognize it usually takes longer than this but I'll never fit in at this one and I think I decided 3 weeks in I didn't WANT to fit in there. I could write a million blog entries on each specific person and the things I've noticed while at work, but I don't want to get down to their level.
Here's one indication though, that says a whole lot. I sit next to a mirror. Why there's a mirror in the office, I'll never know, but I sit next to it (a living hell when you're having a bad hair day, its a constant reminder that you look like a crazy person). People come up to this mirror non stop all day to look at themselves in it and make sure they look okay...and no one ever says hello to me. I've said hello to them and have been met with blank stares. Really? I'm all for checking myself in the mirror as much as the next person, but I'm not for having an ego so huge there isn't room for anyone else to be on my side.
My thing is, if we're all working for the same company, we should all be working towards one common goal...when the company does good, we all do good and when one of us messes up, we all mess up. I've seen battles between companies in the music industry, and I've seen the claws come out, but not between people who are on the same team.
There's always someone tryin to take your spot, and there always will be. I'm just glad I'm not the one who's so worried about it that I forgot how to act...
Me and networking have a love/hate relationship. And by that I mean, I love that it exists, I hate doing it.
I've already posted about networking before, and if you're even thinking about interning you should be prepared to do so. I have a whole folder full of networking resources, if anyone (aka a nerd like me) is interested, ha.
I'm writing about networking again because I didn't realize how much I do it until today. You don't always even have to network with people that are in the same industry as you because in New York (and most other cities too) everybody knows somebody. That means a real estate agent knows the president of a company you want to work for (also known as, how I got my first internship). Or, the chef you know has a cousin who is an A&R at the record label you've got your eye on. It never ceases to amaze me. When I go to clubs these days, I don't go to find a potential date, I go to network. That means as soon as I get the chance, I ask the person, so, what do you do? Which, in turn, forces them to ask me what I do and more often than not, this person either IS somebody that can help me or knows somebody. Thats when you raise your eyebrows like its the most interesting thing you've ever heard and give them a brief (remember, they are at this club/bar to have fun, not talk business with you, and they're probably a little tipsy) breakdown of what you're trying to do and take it from there. Be advised of the impression you give off though because this person could potentially be your key to something better.
Over a month ago I met another real estate guy (these are the BEST people to meet because they deal with all kinds of people) at a bar and he gave me his card. I wrote him the obligatory, nice to meet you, e-mail and all of a sudden, he was my new BFF. He's introduced me to quite a few of his friends, i.e., a DJ from Music Choice, an executive at a major label, and an A&R/owner of another music company. My favorite is the last one he introduced me to. I messaged this person on Facebook just to say hello and nice to meet you, and now he has offered plenty of advice to me on how to reach my dream job. I e-mailed him back and forth today, and I figured while I was at it, I'd e-mail just about everyone else I've met while in NY just to say hello and keep me in the back of their minds.
It doesn't take a lot, and you don't necessarily have to outright ASK for them to do something for you. People can pick up on ingenuity faster than you think. The easiest way to network is let people know what it is that you do and then be yourself.
Start networking! :-)
Knock Knock..
Who's there?
Your anxiety, Internchick....and I'm always gonna be here.
Last night was an adventure to say the least. I should probably back it up here. I have something called generalized anxiety disorder (and before you think I'm some psycho freak and take my blog off your "favorites" 6.8 million people in the U.S. alone have it in any given year). It means that I have long lasting anxiety about everything, its not focused on just one thing (you could say I'm an equal opportunity employer). So what do you get when you have someone with an anxiety disorder who is also an over achiever? You get me, someone with three jobs living by myself in New York. And then what do you get? You get an anxiety attack. A big one.
What is an anxiety attack? Everyone's is different but I get just about every symptom I've ever read comes with anxiety attacks. So that means, uncontrollable crying (I don't do it that often but when I do it, I DO IT), shortness of breath, racing heart, feeling faint or weak, dizziness, back pain, chest pain, and the biggest one, overwhelming fear. Those are just some of the symptoms but they're the ones I hate the most. My anxiety is a lot worse when I've been unhappy for a long period of times. Sometimes I'm completely fine and other times, its really bad. Its just the luck of the draw, ha.
So last night I got in bed around 12 and was pretty excited because this is early for me. I also haven't slept in days, I'm so tired but I get in bed and I just can't sleep, I think I'm supposed to be nocturnal or something, I'm never tired at night! Two hours later, I'm still laying bed and I start crying. I didn't even know I was crying til I saw myself in the mirror. I haven't cried in months so that was a bad choice because I opened up the floodgate and here came the anxiety attack. The worst thing about having one? Having one alone. It was the first time I had to calm myself down and I tired myself out somewhere around 4am. I woke up at 4:45 am and my chest was still really tight. Then I was up until sometime around 8 and slept until my alarm went off at 9:30.
Work was a joke today. I, for once, chose to take care of myself and stayed home. I couldn't even fall back asleep until probably 2pm and got a good 4 hour nap in, which I am so thankful for.
And why am I telling you this? I say that to say this, no matter how hard you work, you always have to put yourself first. That's something I struggle with. A good boss knows a healthy employee is better than an unstable one and the quicker you learn that, the better. Put yourself first and learn to relax, because otherwise you end up with unbearable anxiety along with the other 6.8 million people in this country.
I don't know how to relax because I didn't even experience an ounce of stress until I moved to college and then I really found out what it meant. I don't believe in all that concentrated breathing crap, but what do you guys do to relax??
Today at internship #2, I sat in on a meeting about our label launching a mobile site. I was asked before the meeting to look at the site and write down what I like and what I don't like. Needless to say, my "what I don't like" list was twice as long as "what I do like" list. Its not (completely) that I'm a hater, but at one point at a different internship, it was my sole job for about 2 months to look at our company website and figure out how to make it better and sit in countless boring meetings to discuss it.
So I was asked to come to this meeting and I printed out my notes and showed up at 4:00 sharp. The guy who created the site was running the meeting, which had bad news written all over it. Apparently, this guy created the site without consulting anyone, and didn't show anyone until it was done and mannn is this the worst mobile site I've ever seen!
Clearly, he didn't take the criticism very well.
There were a bunch of people in the meeting but I was the only intern and also the only person who hadn't been at the meeting that was held about the same site last week. So at first I was just getting caught up. Twenty minutes later, we were still on the same subject and I thought I was missing something. How could we still be talking about the same thing? Basically everyone was in agreement on the layout of the site except the guy who created it, who doesn't even want our label's logo on the site, but he wants to talk about branding.
What?
I know a pretty good deal about marketing and that is BAD business. Why would you DO that? I was sitting there just baffled. It got so ridiculous that I decided there was no way I was understanding this correctly. I couldn't even believe we were having a meeting about this in the first place! I didn't mention ONE thing on my list because my suggestions were so beyond the argument of "should we or should we not put our logo on the website?" and I was positive what they were talking about was beyond my understanding.
After the meeting my bosses were talking about how bad it went and what a waste of time it was. They were saying the same things I was thinking, and I realized I WASN'T crazy or dumb, for that matter.
II couldn't help but think, if this guy is THAT stupid and he's in charge, its only a matter of time before I graduate college and (hopefully) take over. Who's with me!
Anybody?
This weekend I went out to celebrate one of my old roommate's birthday (I think I have the record for the most amount of past roommates, but that's for another blog). We went to a club downtown and I was the 2nd person to show up on her guest list. Lame. It was pretty awkward, just sitting there with my $10 drink, looking at my phone every 5 minutes (okay, 5 seconds), and waiting for everyone else to show up. The DJ played some pretty good songs, usually when you show up that early the songs suck and you wonder how this guy even got a job in the first place, then you hope no one is paying this loser to spin such crap.
Finally everyone else coming for her party showed up but no one was really dancing yet. And then the same thing happened that happens every time you go to any club that plays Hip-Hop. The DJ played a set of songs from when one of the labels I work at was in its hey day and the club went nuts, like it always does. I've been hearing variations on this set since I was 12 years old sneaking into clubs I had no business being in (sorry, Mom!). And if you thought about it for a minute, you probably just figured out where I work. But this time it was different.
Those songs came on and everyone put their game face on and started dancing. That's how you get the party started, every DJ knows that (and if you don't, then don't quit your day job).
Anyway, I started dancing and was just as ecstatic as everyone else to hear these songs. But then I remembered I WORK at the place that put these hits out. I was overcome with a huge sense of pride because I remembered this is why I want to work in the music industry. I want to help make the hits that people go crazy for and make them forget that anything else in the world exists except this one song.
So at the end of the day, yeah, its worth it.
Mann, if I had a dollar for every time someone said that to me, I would be one rich intern. Some people hate to see you doing good. Other people hate to see you grindin harder than them. And still other people just hate to see you.
I've been a delinquent blogger lately, you don't have to tell me twice. And so, here's a wrap up of the past couple days that I haven't been blogging and what has been consuming my mind.
Some of the polls have already closed, but if you're sitting on your butt right now reading my blog and you haven't voted yet, go put your voting shoes on, VOTE, then come back and continue reading my blog!
Usually I rant to anyone that will listen about all the perks of living in a big city. I love it, most of the time but lately I really miss the small joys of New England suburbs. What exactly is there to miss when you get to live in the best city of all? Well, I'll tell you!
I was lucky enough to grow up with a washer and dryer in my house (except for the time the drier caught on fire and burnt my favorite Minnie Mouse outfit, that wasn't so lucky). I've adjusted fairly well to having to do laundry in public facilities, and for a germophobe like me, that's no small feat. But doing laundry here always poses some type of problem. Usually the worst part is getting the laundry TO the laundry room. Because of the way the hotel is designed, there is no way to take the elevator to the basement, so you have to take it to the lobby, then get out and take the escalator down. That would be fine except I can never see over my laundry basket to make sure I am actually stepping on the escalator, so I just hope for the best.
...was great! Everyone there is really nice and were very happy to see me. They introduced me to whoever walked by and explained whatever project I was working (how to do it and what it was for). My favorite part about this company is that instead of regular name plates outside everyone's office, they have CD's with the company logo and the person's name on it, which I think is such a cool idea.
The gym and I are on a break.
